“Work on being in love with the person in the mirror who has been through so much but is still standing”
Well, I know most of us will answered yes to most of the questions above if not all.
Back in primary and high school I used to be bullied for my height. (P.S - I am 1.75m which is pretty tall for a girl – apparently). I used to bend my legs every time I stand next to my peers so that I can be the same height as them. My knees used to hurt so much from that!
I was told by one of my former bosses how I would never get another job when I tried to leave because according to him I was not good enough.
I had a friend who was told that they cannot successfully start a company. The list goes on.
And I ask;
According to the definition of self-esteem, only we can determine our own self-worth, abilities and self-confidence.
I wouldn’t be where I am today had I let my bullies’ opinions, my former boss’s hurtful remarks define me. I chose to determine my own self-worth. Your value doesn’t decrease because of someone’s inability to see your worth.
We need to make a deliberate decision to “self-love, self-respect and self-worth”. We cannot give such power to other people.
Here are my top 5 tips which helped me greatly to build my self-esteem and I hope they do same to you too:
1.Accept your imperfections
Make intentional decision to accept your edges and imperfections, especially those you cannot change. It does not matter what you have been told, mistakes you have done in the past or how many times you have failed that grade. You are enough.
2.Find your identity
The reason most of us go seek approval from people is because we don’t know who we are. We spent so much time trying to fit in that we lose our sense of self. Take time to identify your values, strengths, talents, passion and your weaknesses.
3.Engage in activities which satisfy you
When we engage in something that makes us feel good and worthwhile, we experience greater self-esteem.
4.Focus on the positive
Make a habit of celebrating your accomplishments irrespective of how little they may seem. Write down a list of your qualities and go through them every time insecurity tries to creep in.
5.Do away with negative self-talk
Have you ever realised how sometimes we are our own worst critics? Well that needs to stop now. Be kind to yourself and next time you count beautiful things, don’t forget yourself.
Take care of yourself Friends.
Hey there, My name is Dikeledi and I reside in Johannesburg, South Africa.